The importance of reflection in personal growth

When you set some goals for yourself, in any area of life, you should be required to grow and stretch to achieve those goals. Personal growth is one of the most beautiful experiences in life. It is not always noticeable; at least until a great deal of time has passed and you have achieved several of your goals. However, don’t be fooled into thinking that personal growth happens in one big chunk. Personal growth is a daily process. By improving yourself just a little each day; the cumulative effects add up until you have made some really significant progress. If you want to be twice as good at something in 6 months’ time as you are today, you need to make some improvements today, tomorrow and each day that follows.

You will definitely need a learning plan to help you identify the knowledge, skills and attitudes required, to become the person you want to be. In addition to this, on a daily basis, you will need to review your performance and identify things you can improve on. It’s not as difficult as it might sound. All you need to do is commit yourself to a little reflection at the end of the day and; ask yourself some key questions to identify areas for improvement. This will help you to experience some personal growth each day; as long as you follow through on what you learn.

Great questions for personal growth​

At the end of each day, commit 15-20 minutes for a little personal growth reflection. You may wish to use a pen and paper if you find it helps. Ask yourself some key questions, based around what you are trying to improve. The following questions are just some guidelines which you can adapt to meet your needs:

1. Where could I have been more effective today?​

Nobody is 100% effective every day. You will have made some mistakes which will have slowed you down, cost you time and impacted upon the quantity and/or quality of the work you completed.

Once you have identified any incident(s) where you feel you were not fully effective, examine the incident fully; without judging yourself. Just focus on the what went wrong and why you think it went wrong; until you feel that you have a full understanding of the incident.​

Once you understand the incident, determine how you would have liked to deal with the incident differently. You may wish to use your visualisation skills to replay the incident in your mind as you would like it to happen in future.

​Next time that the situation arises, ensure that you implement the new desired behaviour. This is where personal growth takes place.

2. Where could I have performed better in role ‘X’?

You may have several roles in your life e.g.

There are countless possibilities. You may wish to improve your performance in any one of these areas. By reflecting on your performance in the role and, how you could perform better in future; you can ensure that both you and those whom you interact with in that role; enjoy a much happier and healthier experience.

​For example, if you have children and you constantly strive to be a better parent; both you and your kids will benefit immensely. Of course, your partner will also benefit from an improved atmosphere in the house. A better parent-child relationship will also ensure that you and your kids will take that improved happiness into your interactions with others also.

3. Where could I have been more compassionate?

Your ability to be compassionate impacts on every area of your life. You don’t have to agree with others but taking the time to care goes a long way. When things go wrong, it is easy to jump down someone’s throat and assume the moral high ground but easy isn’t always right.

​If you are anything like me, you probably already look back on certain incidents and feel pangs of guilt and regret about how you treated others. You may have meant no harm and; in the long run, there may have been no harm done. But it is important to hold yourself to a high standard and, treating others with respect, compassion and dignity is as high a standard as any.

​You don’t have to judge yourself or beat yourself up but accepting that you could have behaved better and striving to be better in future is a critical component of personal growth.

4. How could I have been more assertive today?

Assertiveness is all about standing up for yourself while respecting others. If you feel you have been poorly treated, you have every right to defend yourself and demand better treatment.

However, there is a way to do so and many, many ways not to do so. If you are too aggressive, you may win the argument but you will irreparably damage the relationship. If you are too passive, people will ignore your concerns and keep walking all over you. Assertiveness is where the balance lies. People know what you will and will not tolerate but they also know that you want to have a relationship with them, based upon mutual respect.​

Whatever it is you are trying to improve, you are probably not going to be successful immediately. You need to actively monitor your perofrmance and identify areas for improvements. Daily, personal reflecion is on of the best tools available to you for this purspose. Given how easy it is to implement and, the many beneftis which can be derived from it, there really is no reason to not implement personal reflection in your life.

If you want to make big changes in your life, you need to set effective goals. Ultimate Guide to Goal Setting will help you do so.

Conclusion

As stated earlier, personal growth is not something which happens all in one go. You need to work each day to ensure consistent growth. Sure, some days you will achieve more growth than others but it is the continual flow of personal growth and learning, each day, which makes the biggest impact in your life. Whatever you are trying to improve in your life, identify some core questions which will allow you to reflect accurately upon your progress and identify the changes you need to make. Implement those changes and you will begin your journey of personal growth.